or, “Love in the Time of Insomnia”, or, “Why I Can’t be a Travel Guide, part 87”

Everyone is Guatemala is at least a foot shorter than me. I’ve looked down on hats and hair; I’ve looked at dandruff from both sides now.

During the entire two weeks of intensive Spanish language courses, I could not alter my mindset enough to see the letter “e” but say the sound “a”. Too many years of conditioning, knowing the vowels at face value was a hard habit to break. Today I got the lesson right, but the timing wrong.

My boarding pass said Gate E18, I read it as “A” and wasted time in the wrong terminal. Or, did it say “A” and I waited in E? Either way, I was off by one vowel and five terminals. My phone hadn’t updated to the current time zone and I thought I planned on spending an hour that I didn’t have. When I was denied boarding the United flight to Phoenix, also learning around 5:50 pm, I knew that that I had to scoot, which I did. I ran/walked down the terminal, caught the train to D, C, B, and then A, ran/walked down to A14 and found nothing. I was so desperate that I actually asked for help, and this time I know which airline (USAir) but A18. A German-sounding airport employee gave me directions and a warning “Don’t go outside of security (How far away can the gate be that leaving the secure area is even mentioned?) She said, “Take the Airlink”.  “That sounds far,” I said.
It is, she said.

 

Oct 11, 2012

I haven’t known the date, or dates, for most of my days here but I know that tomorrow is the 12th – because that’s the day that I get to leave. I hate to sit here, in such a luxurious place, and waste it, and I hate to be in an exotic location and not explore it.

2 pm-ish.  I was just about to leave. I had everything prepared and everything packed to deliver and donate: money, clothes, jewelry, food, etc. But as I made out for the door, I watched the sky only get darker, as the rain clouds lowered, almost touching the lake and definitely covering my destination of San Pedro. And with a slap clap of thunder, I decided against my feeble heroics. Why risk boarding a small craft in choppy water – with possibly lightning – just to deliver some packets of instant soup? I must be maturing. Or, maybe laziness has sharpened my rationalization skills. Either way, I’m staying home and inside.

I came to Guatemala to study Spanish, which I did. I should have set the goal of learning Spanish, not just study it.

Personal observation on the differences between Guatemala and the USA: In the USA, I always think the time is 11:30 am, here in Guatemala, I always think the time is 4:00 pm. And, Guatemala needs bathmats.

Three weeks in the land of near-constant insomnia.

The buildings, houses, stores, schools – run straight down a line, all sharing one exterior wall. The owners delineate their properties by painting them different colors. I wonder if anyone paints outside the lines to make their property look bigger.

 

Scorpions:  my friend, Neil, got stung twice. I didn’t know that Guatemala had scorpions before Neil informed me. I thought that scorpions lived only in the desert. If scorpions could find a dry patch here, I’m impressed. Everything that I’ve touched was damp. Even packaged food was stale and damp.

I woke up at 11:30 pm and needed the toilet. I had no idea where I was but knew that I was half asleep and fully surprised to see a scorpion scuttling across the tiled bathroom floor. I’d seen scorpions in Arizona and they always look like they’re going in reverse. So while this creature was stopped, I couldn’t predict which way it would walk, or crawl, or where I should step. I grabbed a sandal and smashed it, ending its life and my worry. I’m usually a pacifist, but I strongly believe in reincarnation. So in one quick smash, my feet are safe and the scorpion’s gotten a promotion. In its next life, it can be something cuter and it’ll realize how important that is.

 

Leaving Guatemala City’s airport (GUA), my gate was easier to find, even though the numbering system was wonky. I saw a 400+ pound man waiting at gate and knew that he had to be flying to Houston.